Went out yesterday and bought really beautiful underwear, as I thought: if times get tough I won’t be able to afford this. And, like lipstick and chocolate, it’s a luxury you can’t do without. I mean, suppose I lost my job etc and was living on turnips, and then I fell in love… well, I would definitely need this crushed-raspberry set then. I was OFFERED A STORE CARD when I bought them. Also, earlier that morning MBNA sent me a letter asking me if I was feeling hard-pressed by the current crisis, and suggesting that all my troubles could be solved if I TOOK OUT ANOTHER CREDIT CARD.
I spent a lot of time yesterday telling myself that, as Miggins kindly suggests, tarots only mean something if you believe they do. This would have worked, maybe, if I hadn’t chatted to Jo about it. She immediately told me about her aunt, who kept getting towers, and skeletons with reaping tools etc, whenever she did her tarots, and eventually got so concerned about it she went to a range of fortune-tellers, who all, one after the other told her she was going to die early. And she did die early etc…
Jo had this secretive, pleased look on her face while she told me this. I hate it when female friends look like that when you’re in trouble. Although I have to say that I occasionally find it quite hard to keep a similar look off my face. When Jo told me a while ago that her wedding was being delayed as Martyn had decided (and more important, his mother had decided), it should happen in the spring, when some wonderful wedding place he knows about will be free to book, I had to try desperately hard to look truly sad for Jo. I was sorry she was having to wait. But also, deep in my heart there was a tiny malevolent – totally wrong - bit of me that was cackling with glee.
2 comments:
Ha! Cow is also (secretly) pleased the wedding is put off.
It took Cow a few days of thinking about it to come up with an answer to your Tarot Card conumdrum, but she finally posted (Scones previous article).
And now, (Topiary waving neatly trimmed branches over the Mystic Topiary Card Deck) she will give Scones her OWN SPECIAL Topiary Land Card reading.
Yes, you Must Believe in the Land of Topiary and it's muses. Okay? Believing? In the proper reverent frame of mind?
Topiary sees the cards. Cards are magically levitating away from Scones and turning themselves to Cow for reading...
What's this?
Why, it's the Magic Raspberry Underwear Card! Scones' aura has drawn it OUT of the Deck!
Plus, it's pointing North!
And, there's a aroma of lemon and cloves wafting from the cards!
These are all Truly Auspicious Signs signifying:
-wonderful underwear in Scones' future
-an abundance of Neatly Trimmed Topiary on Scones walkway
-Great Changes in Scones' Love Life
-Probiotic Yogurt and Raspberry Underwear will combine to bring a stunning weight loss and exercise regimen
-Scones will then be the loveliest Scone on the block!
-This will attract Good Fortune, a Cute Boyfriend, and a Great Job Opportunity.
Cow is coming out of her trance now.....
Moo!
Dear Topiary, this is such a lovely, funny, kind way to get me over my fear of tarots! How wonderful that you have gone to so much trouble!. It has really worked, too. I feel much happier about it all, Love from scones xx
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