My New Gay Best Friend

I was so miserable yesterday evening, and then I decided to take the advice offered by the kind people who visit this website and ring Pym. He told me to come round at once – said he’d been wanting to ring me but hadn’t been able to get hold of my number from Rache because she was out nightclubbing with Vasilius and Dimitrius.
So I went to Maida Vale, which is a lovely safe place to go to at night, its streets seemingly empty except for well-groomed Arabs and their servants. Pym had opened some champagne (it is all he drinks, apparently), and made some crostini things to eat, and he sat me down and told me not to worry about the cards, they all had positive meanings as well as bad ones. In fact he said the same sort of thing Miggins and Topiary and had. And then he asked me if I wanted to try again, and held out the cards. So I took a deep breath and held them in my hands for a while (you are supposed to suffuse them with your being etc) and then picked out 7. And it was really weird, but I got pretty much the same cards as before, with the Tower in the middle. Pym said this nearly always happens. He studied the cards for ages, then told me not to worry, it was actually quite positive. He said there are going to be really massive changes in my life very very soon, and everything I’m used to will be turned upside down. But after that, I will find a lot of wonderful, good, positive things happening, and my life will actually be better.
I felt so much happier after this. And we just chatted away for hours. It’s amazing talking to him because he is so gorgeous and so kind. (He said he adored my shoes. I had worn one of my favourite pairs to cheer myself up. They are pink.) And he told me about a great vintage shop to go to, and then I told him about THE BOOK and he said he wished they’d write something similar for gays, as he is always getting his heart broken. (Though Rache has told me that he goes for incredibly beautiful, vain, shallow young men, so this is pretty much bound to happen.)I even told him about this blog, and he said it sounded like a ‘chick-lit blog’, which I suppose it is. There was something v pleasurable, in a weird way, about having such an intimate chat with a man I could never have sex with. I’ve never had a close gay best friend, but I can really see the appeal now.